T-Shirts for the short and fat

So here's the thing. I like T-shirts but i hardly ever wear them. Why? Because if i buy a medium i look like Budda on the beach...



..and if i buy a large or extra large i look like teenage skater (which i was once) with said garment hanging around my knees.


Neither of which are a good look.

Why isn't there anywhere one can buy t-shirts for short fat people?

The tall and skinny (or fat for that matter) are well catered for with the High & Mighty's of the world, but where is there a Not that Short & Slightly Portly with a bit of a Beer Belly?

Seeing as the western World's collective waistline is expanding at an alarming rate i can see a business opportunity on the horizon. But i can't be arsed to do it.

So if someone else does, please let me know.

A Model Photographer

Tilt-shift photography... Bloody Hell!

Not really heard much about it until a mate sent me this link. Unbelievable effects can be acheived with the right eye and a bit of patience. Only £650 for one to fit my Nikon, wonder how i can get that to 'disappear' from the joint account.

Surfing the main unit

Click To Play

Some friends of mine made this short whilst they were working on the set of 28 Days Later. Surfing the main unit basically means borrowing the resources of the main shoot to satisfy your own short film addiction. Nice idea and nice work too.

Steppan Oooof.

Another beautiful idea that I'm likely to nick when it comes to decorating my new flat. Photographer Helga Steppan gathered all her personal possessions (and went to the shops to add to the aesthetic i'd guess) and grouped them by colour.

Then took these rather delightful photos. You can see them at the Man & Eve gallery in SE11 till the end of July.

Helix Aspersa

You might not recognise the name but i bet you're familiar with the crunching sound they make when you step on the dawdling little buggers.

I'm a massive fan of snails, highly under-rated beasts.

Some things about snails:

They can live for seven years - fact!

The biggest can grow to 30cm in length - fact!

caracóis" is Portuguese for snails - fact!

Anyhoo, look at them more closely - you can see their mouth move and hear them eating.

I just took this shot in my garden (Nikon D70s Sigma 70mm f2.8 macro for those of you who care).

BiReality audio-video supergeekdom

Working for a forward-thinking interactive agency has many professional advantages; intelligent design, cutting-edge technology and of course lots of geeks.

My colleague Manuel is just about the coolest rude boy in the geekosphere and he's just sent me this. I thought, and still think, it's a total windup (the VO is of a genius that cannot be scripted and the whole thing has an air of The Day Today about it).

I'm assured however that this is actually a real project.

Click on the quicktime, sit back, open your mouth and marvel.

So there is such a thing as too much rock \m/

This is easily the best blag i have ever heard. Definately need to hook up with Roger Tullgren and find out exactly how much rock is too much.

Being Bill Oddie

Ask any of my mates and they'll tell you that I'm a bit of a natureboy, bill oddie bore. Always banging on about some obscure nuance of natural history. I'm not much of a nature photographer mainly due to time, money and lack of patience but i have taken one or two in my time. Look, there's one.



However, if i ever start playing with the big boys i'll have my work cut out for me.

Seeing ads like this makes me green

See this...

It's a widget for info on the client i currently work for - completely square i know but they'd probably kick the livin shit out of me if i didn't put it up.

Actually that's a lie. I did it coz i wanted to and I'M THE SQUARE!

That's also a lie. They are square squared - bloody Scandis.

And the winner is...

Me!

Just found out i won an award for an email i did at my last agency. The email was part of a bigger campaign for Mazda to promote their Sakata special editions. The Print campaign showed the cars in training shoe boxes so, along with the talented Art Director Chris May, we came up with the idea of spoofing a trainer website. The site didn't win Jack but the email was Imperatives Email Campaign of the year 2007.

Here's the email...

Intruder

Nuff Said.

Really, really, really, really, really, good looking

Man, didn't these guys watch Zoolander? I mean do ads like this still sell fashion? I know it's a fragrance but it's all the same kinda thing.

Laughable!

The Barbados Nature Reserve

Last week i was at The Barbados Nature Reserve. Should have been called The Barbados Shagging Tortoise Reserve as there were literally thousands of the randy buggers 'doing it' all over the place. Anyhoo, here are some pictures of some monkeys...